I have a confession to make. I’m a terrible secret-keeper. Those of you close to me know I cannot lie to save my life. It’s something I was just not blessed with past the age of 17. So I apologize for my lack of posts here but we have big news to share! We found out a few weeks ago that we are, in fact, expecting our first child in early February!!!!
The news was met with the initial shock, excitement, nervousness and giddiness- emotions you would expect from first-time expectant parents. We called our family and closest friends immediately to share the news. Ryan wanted to shout it from the mountaintops but I reigned him in a bit. I wanted to meet with our midwife before going really “public”. Of course, if you follow me on Twitter, it’s pretty damn obvious I’ve got a bun in the oven.
And I know that you’re technically supposed to wait until the 2nd trimester to tell everyone because miscarriage happens but I run a very successful and well-read blog here people! If that’s what happens, it’s real life and I don’t feel squeamish or embarrassed to share each step of the way with our friends and family. Especially since we’re 12 hours from most of our loved ones, I figured this would be a much easier way than calling the gang every few days to update on my still non-existent belly. Don’t worry, lots of pictures to come! 🙂
We’re meeting with our midwife on Friday and I’m writing this a few days in advance. I’ll post another follow-up with my initial feelings regarding her and the TRICARE insurance process, which I hope is not the bureaucratic nightmare I imagine it to be. We’ve decided that pending the announcement of twins + (both of us have natural multiples as siblings) or any other unforeseen medical complications, we will be having Baby A at home.
Our choice to have a homebirth was made after much discussion and tons of research. As you should know by now, this is not my first pregnancy. Though Aden’s birth went off without a hitch, it was a lengthy process (20+ hours) in which I had absolutely no voice or sense to speak up or ask questions. I was 18 at the time so I didn’t know what I wanted anyway, but I refuse to let that experience repeat itself with this delivery. I want to be able to determine when and if we need intervention and I want precious little of that to be medical. Jacking me up with pitocin, antibiotics and pain medications is not the way I want to bring our baby into the world.
Our research process began with watching some really great documentaries on homebirth vs. hospital delivery vs. birthing centers and we learned a LOT. It is shocking to me how many women are in the dark about the options available to them. Birth isn’t something that happens TO you. It is an active process in which we can speak up and at times, control. Of course things happen which our not in our plan, but those are much fewer and farther between than the medical field would have you believe.
The Business of Being Born and Pregnant in America (both available to stream on Netflix if you so desire) are two I recommend highly. I actually watched BBB shortly after we got married on the recommendation of my sweet friend Lauren. From that moment on, I knew a hospital birth was not for me. Ryan & I watched it together last year and like me, he was convinced he did not want our birth experience to be in a hospital unless 100% medically necessary.
There are options out there and I encourage mothers to look into them all. Of course, there are stories where things go drastically wrong in the blink of an eye. I read Young House Love’s account of the birth of little Clara and it scared the shit out of me. Not enough to get me back into the hospital but it definitely makes me realize life is fragile and nothing is promised. I think we’re all aware of what CAN go wrong. How about all the times when nothing goes wrong? Or when something does but you have an experienced midwife there to make sure it all works out like my friend Joni?
My mom had all of her children Cesarean section and while I am thankful that option was available (especially for the triplets!), I want to make damn sure that it’s not used on me because the doctor needs to head out for a round of golf. Pregnancy & birth are not a medical conditions. They are natural states for a woman to be in. Our bodies were made to do both with little outside help. Embracing a birthing environment which celebrates this ideal is our ultimate goal. And the safety and well-being of Momma & baby is our top priority. We’re hoping a homebirth can offer both of those for our family.